|
Learn
about POWER
INVESTOR, the screening software I recommend in my
books. It costs only $99 but tracks more stocks and funds
than MetaStock ($929) and Window on Wallstreet ($704). |
Articles
Life Without TV
by Jason Kelly
4/2/2002
I suppose it's time to share an important personal tidbit with those of you who know me only through my writing:
I don't own a TV.
Notice that the sentence above does not read "I don't watch much TV," nor does it read "I hate what's on TV." It reads "I don't own a TV" and that means that if you walked across every square foot of my house, you would not find a TV. You would find the unused antenna cord tucked behind a bookshelf in the living room. That's the closest you would get.
I offer these important clarifications because when sharing this tidbit in real life I've been subjected to severe interrogations. So implausible does it seem to most people that life is possible without TV that I need to work through several layers of shock, denial, gradual understanding, and eventual acceptance. About 20 percent of people who learn this about me continue to regard me in the same way. The remaining 80 percent are polite, but forever changed. I understand from my friends working in law enforcement that recovering pederasts face similar reactions when forced to reveal their history to neighbors.
The most typical reaction to the no-TV revelation is a series of defensive claims. "I own one, but I hardly ever watch it," most people say. Another variant is, "I only watch educational programs like the Discovery Channel and the History Channel." By announcing that I don't own a TV I have, apparently, drawn an intellectual line in the sand. Those on my side use their brains; those on the other side don't.
The truth is, I don't see TV ownership as a proxy for a low IQ. I would never judge a person by their inability to discuss anything beyond last night's sitcom or this morning's Good Morning America. I am much more secure knowing that people are quietly mesmerized before the glowing square than wandering aimlessly through my neighborhood disturbing my reading.
Occasionally, somebody inquires about my childhood. They want to know where I'm from and whether I grew up without a TV. This is astute investigative work and has been an immediate ego salve for those who've used it. My answers take them off the hook. I'm from the Rocky Mountains of Colorado. My family owned a TV but we had such poor reception that we hardly ever watched it. We occasionally rented movies to play on the VCR, but that's about it.
"Ah, well that explains it," the relieved will say. "I grew up in a household where the TV made constant background noise. I heard it at breakfast, lunch, dinner, and before bed. When calling home, I heard it under the talking. Always on, I tell you. I got used to it. It was a part of life."
I could buy a TV if I wanted one. I don't have any religious objection to it. I don't think less of people who watch it. I don't even think TVs themselves are stupid machines. In fact, the new TV technologies are cool. High definition, split screens, instant replay of live programming, and simultaneous viewing and recording all dazzle me. I would love to have a TV and watch it all day except for one small hang-up: I don't like what's on.
The entertainment is not entertaining to me. The news is not informative to me. The commercials are not tolerable to me. Other than that, TV is great.
When people ask how I stay informed without a TV, I reply by asking how they can stay informed with a TV. It's the most uninformative waste of time available. Ten minutes with any news publication -- even the awful ones -- will tell you volumes more about current events than you'll ever learn from glamorous news anchors. If instead of an awful news publication you read a good one such as The Economist or The Week, you'll be infinitely ahead of the TV-watchers.
Another common question facing TV non-owners, which is to say me, is, "What do you do?" as if watching TV counts for doing anything at all. A fine riposte to this one is to ask, "What do you not do?" Here is a sampling of multiple choice answers to simplify the thought process:
- Read
- Read aloud to your children
- Engage in conversation
- Listen to silence
- Take a walk
- Lie on the lawn
- Visit a friend
- Invite a friend over for dinner
Doing just about anything makes me happier than watching TV.
For a quick and animated list of things to do instead of watch TV, note what the characters on a TV show do. They don't watch TV. That would make for a boring story. TV show characters go to dinner with friends, get into trouble, date, break up, work, struggle, and otherwise live. It's a convenient list of things you could be doing yourself instead of watching somebody else do them.
But then again, actually doing things takes energy and can be a lot of work. Come to think of it, just keep watching. I'm sure it's as good as the real thing. Why else would 98 percent of U.S. households own a TV?
As for me, I'm keeping the antenna cord tucked behind the bookshelf in the living room. When asked by new visitors where I keep the TV, it's fun to tell them, "Over there, behind the bookshelf."
Return to Articles
|
5–9 reader votes 
20+ reader votes